hilltop

sameer hilltop

lakeside

i tuk dis pic..gorgoues rite?tats powai lake..IIT Bombay

MY ORDEAL

I entered with lots of confidence and among my various competitors was the first one to get a place.So far so good.To prepare myself , i thought to have a nap and utilize the time, so i slept off for 10 minutes and as soon as i woke up, i got a shock, the number of competitors had increased rapidly.The gathering had turned into a crowd and i seemed to be the weakest physically among all the participants.There were men and women of all colours and sizes and i, just a meek girl who hardly weighed 45 kgs among those heavyweight champions, but i consoled myself that i had mental strength and that is what matters in a competition.I had a strong will power and i would fight valiantly.

As i looked at the area i had to cross, a slight terrror rose inside me.Fear...fear of failure...fear of not being able to complete in time..fear of being left behind..that fear which induces a weird pain in the pit of your stomach..nervousness hit me..but i stood strong..or rather sat strong as i was sitting at that time..i was just devising my game plan when i saw a competitor rise and go forward to cross..there was a smile on his face..was it the smile of nervousness or of silent confidence, i couldn't tell..as he rushed and struggled his way through i also consoled myself a little that success was possible..for a while he disappeared and my breath stopped for a moment..but he finally re-emerged triumphant..he suddenly turned back and smiled at all the people who were yet to cross or were crossing..was it the smile of support or was it a way to mock?..i chose to believe that it was one of support..

i was just thinking all this when suddenly my turn came..out of the blue.. i did not even get a chance to make my game plan..but i had courage..i took god's name and stepped in..steppped in into the labyrinth..every step i took closer to my goal made me more confident..a lot of hustling had to be done..i hurt lot of people to get ahead..but that didn't disturb me..it had to be done..there was no option..finally i came through to the other side..the victory was mine..i felt like doing a victory jig to make the other people who had yet not crossed jealous..but i decided against it as my stop had come..but i still got out of the bus smiling..my ordeal successful..

why do i cry soo much??

why do i cry so much?
i donot know really..but i am a champion at crying..for every possible reason or to put it better for no reason at all..though i always end up thinking of an excuse..But basically, i just love to cry..there is this urge i get once in a while..or i should say very often in a while, to let out all my emotions..burst out..cleanse myself of all my negative feelings..and after i cry i feel this immense sensation of peacefulness..you could say it gives me a high like drugs give to some people..it makes me euphoric..amazing isn't it?..have you ever heard of someone enjoying crying?Well, I do..in fact i think i should put crying as a hobby in my orkut profile..
I am writing all this after an amzing crying session..And while i was writing this, i decided to check out what wikipedia had for crying..here are some interesting facts-

Crying as an emotional reaction is considered by many to be a uniquely human phenomenon, though some studies suggest that elephants and gorillas may cry as well.

Emotional triggers are most often anger and grief, but crying can also be triggered by sadness, joy, fear, humor, frustration, or other strongly-experienced emotions.

In many cultures, crying is associated with babies and children. Some cultures consider crying to be undignified and infantile, casting aspersion on those who cry publicly. In most cultures, it is more socially acceptable for women to cry in public than men.

An insincere display of grief or dishonest remorse is called crocodile tears, from the ancient anecdote that crocodiles would pretend to weep while luring or devouring their prey.

Many religions describe gods or prophets as crying:
* The shortest verse in the Bible (in the King James Version of the Bible and some other English translations) is simply: "Jesus wept."
* Jade is sometimes known as "tears of the Buddha".
* The Incas referred to silver as the "tears of the moon".

just arbitgiri...part IV

1)day started out boring..tried to study but no mood..so ditched..den waited for supposedly different sunday lunch and it turned out so bad tat i missed the usual one..ppl say r sunday lunch hasnt been changed for the past 10 years..i mean wow..talk abt tradition
2)tried watchin a movie wid frnds..but was useless...got bored
3)watched two episodes of "how i met ur mother"..gud
4)then came the aweesooome part..went to LEELA wid chinky for my cousin chachu's marriage...it was a love marriage..but arranged later..chachu sardar nd the girl a sharma(hindu)..they supposedly had known each oder for 8 years but no1 knew..the cutest thing was the ppt. they had prepared with both of them's childhood fotos..was veryyy cute...i had fun..dressed up and all for it..had gud food..(amazin punjabi food..gr8 desserts..dal makhani was awwessomee)..nd then danced to punjabi songs..overall fun niteeeeeeeee...missed family a bit coz last marriage pe we all were together nd had lotsaaa fun..but was nice spending time wid chinky..talked a lott..
4)everyone is wearin black bands tomr to protest abt the LAN BAN in IIT..cool rite..hope all this bears some fruit..
all in all content today..

just arbitgiri..part III

1) slept for the earlier part of the day..then watched half of yes boss..had watched it be4 but watched again to giv company ..the first time i watched it i had liked it..now i thought kya fartt dialogues hain..
2) then went wid lots of enthu to mardi gras (fest of hostel 11, 12 ,13)..i wanted to eat the punjabi food they had so much publicised..dragged vikash nd mishra along..chinky already had enthu too..so all four of us went expecting gudd food and tai tai fishh..it was horrible..overexpensive nd dint even taste well..i wanted to dance but no company..only interestin part was the red bull people..they were sponsors for the fest..there were these girls givin free redbulls..red bull is an energy drink..the girls givin them were so hot nd IIT guys being IIT guys followed dem all over..it was like wild animals behind a catch..seriously was sick to watch ..they surrounded her nd the poor girl was so harrassed but i guess they get paid for this girl appeal only..
3) the food was so bad tat we all went out to eat after tat..to KFC..was fun..esp coz we were all behavin like kids the whole time..cool tha..then bak to hostel
overall nice day..had fun

just arbitgiri..part II

1)i dint make the audition..which for a while sucked then i comforted myself by the thought of my chachu's marriage coming up..since i am finaly going to be attendin a punjabiiiii wedding im happpy..lookin fwd to the food..hehe
2)my dad sent me chocolates...i saw them at a shop with him and really liked their packing but refused to buy them coz i dint want to waste money...and imagineeee he sent me the same chocolates..i looovvveee my family soo much..
3)a thankz to my friend chinky(ya tats her actual name) for takin care of me today wen i was feeling very down.
4)i am goin for a budday treat nowww..yipppeeee
5)i still love myselfff..nd my life totally..
6)IIT will not hav net working in the nite from 1130 pm to 1230 pm the next day from 26th jan onwards..doesnt that suckkk...how wil we manage?i dnt knw..wil write a long crib on this..gotta go for my treat now..tataaa for today
7)editing this 3 hours later
8)i talked to my best friend for an hour today..wow did it feel gud to discuss about arbit stuff wid her..school..past stupid crushes..gossip..felt gr8
9)i walked alone after ages today...lakeside..outside my hostel..was nice:)..felt gud spending time with mee..
10)i am not as happy as i sound:)